BFP!? yeah- crazy huh? as soon as i saw these lines pop up i started bawling- unfortunately they weren't tears of joy as one might think- ugh, here's the story:
my BETA after my FET was on 09/19 and it was negative (it was a 4- but yeah)
so i was ok with that, my period came & went & i moved on. then this past weekend i started bleeding & cramping & etc (see below entries) so i finally called the RE & went in for bloodwork & an ultrasound.
well they called & told me that my BETA is 364!!! what?! how?! so i drive back to Lexington & the dr asked a bunch of questions to try & rule out an ectopic. honestly though, they're not sure yet what's going on. it's too early to see anything so we'll just have to wait & see.
most likely this is a non-viable pregnancy (m/c) & it'll either pass on it's own or i'll need a little help (in the way of a shot or two)
aaaaaaah! so yeah- i don't even know. i'm trying not to focus on this- something i've wanted so bad & for so long is in my grasp & i'm not going to be able to keep it. it's not fair- that about sums it up.
anyway- i was lying on the bed, holding the FRE, sobbing & feeling sorry for myself when i saw a little paw shoot out- i had to laugh. gary was attacking the pee stick with a fury. it was hilarious. i got some pictures & started laughing histarically...and then started crying again. ugh- SO UNFAIR!!!! i want to ask God why? but i hate to question Him- He knows what He's doing & He has a plan for me- hopefully it includes a little bird :)
anyway- i'll keep everyone updated & we'll see where this all goes. i hate waiting- ugh.
wow- 2 lines on a stick- i really can't get over it. ::le sigh::